The day got off to an auspicious start, as club regular Calum Daley finally received his baggy cap.

After winning the toss, the plough chose to bowl first, opening with Vicki and Calum, head crowned by the blue and gold cap. The first few overs went by rather rapidly, with very few runs conceded thanks to some tight and controlled bowling from both openers. Alas, no wicket was found, but the very important job of probing out the deck was performed.

Despite Max's warnings about the bounce, or lack thereof, and how that lead him to hone his style of playing forward, I don't think any of us were prepared for quite how little bounce there would be on anything bowled outside off. It was most unfortunate for Rob, who did a much better job of keeping than the byes column would indicate - there really is very little one can do when it is rolling down the ground at you.

After a switch of bowler, Jay Patel came on to work his usual magic and break the first partnership, caught Edmonds. I would describe in detail the catch Harry took, but actually can't remember which it was because he took so many. So, I'm going to get them all out of the way here. There was a beauty at cover which involved a two handed sideways dive (though I think that might have been disallowed as a bump ball - more on that later). There was another beauty at extra cover - two handed out stretched over the head - and yet another the details of which are lost to the excitement of the grab because I'm sure it was equally as impressive.

So, with the opening bat out, on came Niraj Tailor to carry on the attack. As I'm sure I've already documented in one match report, and I did have a look to see if I could plagiarise, NT's bowling this season has been superb. The flight and dip is beautiful to watch, he is in complete control and the result was an eight over spell of complete domination. It was particularly amusing to watch the battle with ERIC (as he is named on the scorecard) who was unable to get his head around Niraj's bowling at all, not that it stopped him from swinging as hard as he could at each and every delivery and rarely connecting.

I'm not sure he minded as he sent three other bats to the pavillion for only 19 runs. One was trapped LBW, the other two fell to pretty much the same delivery dragging it onto the wicket. As rare as it is to see a drag onto the wickets, we had the pleasure of seeing three: Cash bowled the aforementioned ERIC, bowling as he has all season: very well. The same can be said for Tunnacliffe who, although no wicket was taken, barely made it into double figures off five overs.

Then came the infamous "bump ball" mentioned earlier. After at least a minutes deliberation, the umpires deemed it not out. All I will say is props to the batsman - he has the single most powerful strike I've ever seen to be able to bump a ball into the ground and send it maybe 20m up and across in a perfect parabolic arc. Bravo, sir...

With the openers coming back on to finish off the game, Calum took a couple of wickets in the same over - one LBW and one caught by (unsurprisingly) Edmonds and Vicki bowling another to leave the total score on 198-8. Tea was, as usual at Morden, divine. A fine spread of hot and cold treats with particular care given to the smorgasboard (is that how it's spelt - who cares?) of pastries and scones to weigh down the oppo before they took to the field.

Elmo and Edmonds opened the batting, dealing really rather well with the pitch that refused to bounce when sent down off. There were a fair few sexy shots in there, especially from Elmo who looked, as always, remarkably good while crunching it through the covers and the like. Alas, the troubling partnership was not to last as Elmo edged off to the keeper. Then in came Tunnacliffe, who's charming mother was watching on from the sidelines, as her son began to smash the ball about.

Edmonds and Tunnacliffe are known for their rapid acceleration and today was no exception. For a total of 25, Tunnacliffe hit five fours and Edmonds only lagged on behind. Both had strike rates worthy of the engine room. As this hit of fuel was injected into the game, the onlooking Plough relaxed somewhat and sank back into their seats with pints in hand. Unfortunately, skipper Max's decision to get another pint since he didn't look like he'd be needed anytime soon proved disastrous for their pair at bat. Tunnacliffe hit two fours but couldn't quite clear the fielder for the third and retired to the pavillion.

In then came Rob who'd had a tough day of it behind the stumps, now all to well aware of the devilish lack of bounce the pitch was capable of. Unfortunately he caught the ball we'd all been dreading all day and there was practically nothing he could do as it slid through to his wickets. Edmonds was dismissed in a similar vain, though this time it was a ball that just jagged in a bit off the seam.

This left captain Max and Jay to steady the ship and that they did. With the rapid platform laid by Tunna and Edmonds, Max and Jay were free to settle in while keeping abreast of the required rate. A particular highlight of Max's innings for me was the protracted holding of his pose after being hit in the pad, highlighting quite how far down the track he was, as if he were prostrating himself before the umpire, but actually highlighting quite how ridiculous an appeal it was.

Jay played a marvelous innings and was top scorer for the day. Not only did he deal with the tricky balls masterfully, but he smashed boundaries regularly enough and looked good doing it. Once again, with drinks on the horizon, the Plough settled into their seats and enjoyed England's demolishing of the West Indies.

There was a rather amusing, almost Jeeves and wooster-esque display by the oppo's wicket keeper at the resume of play. The oppos wiki was adamant he was at the correct end, despite the protestations of the other 23 blokes on the pitch, and set himself up right in the way of the bowlers run up. With the confusion cleared up, it was time for Max and Jay to both lose their wickets and both caught.

In then came Calum Daley and Justin Cash to ramp up the pace a bit. But again, the bowling proved rather too effective. The oppo knew their deck and kept the lines outside of off, without deviation, making it a nightmare to get the ball outside the Corden.

Nevertheless, Cashy and CD did a great job of keeping the board turning over and keeping the Plough in the game. Alas, Cashy lost his wicket to the opener, returned for a second spell at the death. Vicki and Yates soon followed suit and by soon I mean immediately: picture a small waterfowl that's golden in colour and you'll get the gist.

To close up NT came on and hit several quick singles with CD knocking it about too, despite the onslaught from the bowling attack. After an amazing six straight back over the bowler from CD, which the oppo fielder caught very casually at waist height but made no effort at all to keep it on the pitch, the game was left very tensely at 6 needed from the last ball.

It was not meant to be, oimoi, but it was a great game going down to literally the last ball. Normally I'd type some wise words to sum up, but Calum put it so wisely in the WhatsApp post game that I'm going to shamelessly plagurise and paste it below:

"Never easy to accept losing by such a small margin, as we discussed after the game it’s so easy to pick out moments where we could have saved or scored those extra 6 runs. Most of us can probably all individually identify somehwere in the game we could have done this either with bat, ball or in the field so it’s not right for anyone to go away and put the blame on something that they did for us falling short.
Some great individual performances out there yesterday, good captaincy from Max Gumpert⁩ and think we just played well as a team too. Stay confident and back yourselves next game lads ?"

Match report from Dave Yates